(Written October 1st) I write from an airplane carrying me from LAX (Los Angeles) to ORD (Chicago). I’ll soon join my Midwest-based family for a whirlwind three days, a trip within a trip, before flying back to California to re-join my brother and then my fiancée for the second of two West Coast weddings, the […]
Continue readingAuthor: LSchwaar
Broken Models (Musing)
A couple weeks ago, my model broke. I had been duct-taping said model together for a long while. That proved ultimately to be a futile effort. In the midst of my life feeling a little hair-brained and too full for its britches anyway, the fundamental understanding I had been holding in my hands that tried […]
Continue readingSummer 2024: It’s Official
I write from a dog-sitting job for a friend here in Denver, enjoying a covered porch and a pleasantly cool day and the sound of birds discussing something arbitrary in the neighbor’s trees a distance away. Life marches on at an almost frantic pace sometimes and I’m finding it more and more difficult to keep […]
Continue readingThe Stories We Tell (Musing)
It’s striking me as interesting today that the stories we herald and treasure — the epics, the required readings, the stories we pass down and that have stood the test of time — almost always include a dramatic arc through conflict and resolution. Why do we love the Lord of the Rings quests so much? […]
Continue readingHealthy Hope (Musing)
My relationship with God has been… strained over the last few months. My hope and expectation reached a breaking point, and most of what I feel now towards Him is deep disappointment, mistrust, and hurt. This is not the first time I’ve bumped up against feelings of frustration and (what I feel is a reasonable […]
Continue readingWinter 2023: Looking Back and Looking Ahead
(Written December 28th, 2023) I write from the back of a packed Frontier flight carrying me from Midway Airport (Chicago) to Denver International. It’s early morning and I have a full Denver day ahead of me. I’ll see JT tonight and in two days will fly to Seattle to spend New Year’s with her sister […]
Continue readingA Memo On My Last Three Years
The last three years of my life have included a facet I never expected (or wanted, if God had felt like asking). It was terrifying then excruciating, daunting, mystifying, galvanizing, still terrifying, and has slowly and subtly given way to becoming one of the most significant parts of my life. I don’t anticipate that changing. […]
Continue readingGood and Evil (Musing)
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the natures of good and evil. First thought: I recently listened to Jonathan Haidt, author of The Righteous Mind and what I’m sure are other worthwhile works, talk about “moral pluralism” — his conclusion after studying morality anthropologically. While there doesn’t seem to be only one version of […]
Continue readingRain in the Distance (Musing)
Noticing today how rain in the distance appears so differently than I might have assumed if I thought about it. Rain up close – right above you, dampening or soaking you, tangible and near and audible – is readily discernible: countless drops, coordinated but separate. Rain can toy with you in breaths and waves, different […]
Continue readingThe Scariest of All? (Musing)
I drive past a funeral home on my way home from JT’s. This morning as I caught sight of its sign, the two names conjoined to make the business name made me think of the sorts of individuals that would start or run a funeral home. I hope they’re not prone to fear of the […]
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